This year has moulded me into an almost unrecognisable person from the one that sat before this computer twelve months ago. Every year I feel as if life gets a little tougher, I can actually envision myself saying how hard last year was as I was about to tell you how this year had been my hardest year yet. Almost every day out of the past 365 days has felt like an uphill struggle but it has taught me so much about myself that I wouldn’t ever choose to erase them from my memory. This year has taught me that I am able to conquer my demons, I am able to work through my issues and I can learn to enjoy life again.
Throughout the past twelve months I have gained new family members, rekindled old friendships and learned how to be more accepting of who I am. I travelled to new places, I’ve listened to live music, partied with friends until the early hours and gained memories and experiences that will stay with me until I am old and grey. All of these things are so positive that they practically radiate through any of the negative moments that this year has brought to me.
So yes, this year has been unimaginably hard but it has also been unmistakably rewarding and as I move into a new year, with all its new beginnings and fresh starts I want to take a little of the past twelve months with me. Not a lot, just enough to remember that although life can often be dark, there is a little light twinkling at the end of the tunnel that you will reach it eventually.
I haven’t been excited for my future for years but now, I am itching to work my way into the new year. This for me is the biggest step in realising that my mental health is getting better, not only do I feel as if I now have a future in sight but I am actively looking forward to seeing what these new days bring me.
I’ve shed a little tear at this post. It would usually seem silly to cry over a blog post but when I consider how far I’ve come I just feel proud. Next year is not going to be perfect, life never is. Things will undoubtedly go wrong, there will be arguments and disagreements. I will probably end up drinking too much at one point, spend the next day with a raging hangover hating how drunk me though tequila was a great idea. I might have a dip in my mental health, anxiety could worm its way back up from the pit of my stomach and I could feel depressed again but I feel so much more accepting of these things now (Okay maybe not the hangovers but you see where things are going here).
So lets raise a glass to twenty seventeen and bid a fond farewell to the year that has tested us all. I can’t see where the next 365 days take me.
Top – Free People
Jacket – Free People
Jeans – Nasty Gal
Shoes – Reef